Fur baby

This will be a short post. I just want to show you how cute Sofia is with her boots and fur hat. Okay, well it's actually Uncle Ryan's bomber hat, and it's kind of too big, so we will just have to find one Sofia-sized.


Those booties were mine when I was a baby, then they were my brother's, and now they are Sofia's. Really soft leather and warm fur. Not sure what kind, but either way, they are great and they are warm, and something like that would cost way too much, so I am glad that I have them! She loves them. I am glad they fit her. They probably won't fit for too long since she just keeps growing. My little bean...

I've stayed at my mom and dad's this past weekend while Husband was off hunting. They are so helpful. Last night my mom offered to take care of her so I could sleep. I got to sleep all night long!! I love my parents. I don't know what I would do without them.

Sofia must have been good, I mean, she is always good. But I think my dad is a bit tired. It has been a few years....or rather, 2½ decades since he had to be woken up a couple times a night to help with baby. I think he was a bit tired today. But look! What a great papa! After all these years he still knows how to multitask.... catch up on sleep AND get baby down for a nap.

chunky.

It's Saturday afternoon and I have the opportunity to take a nap because Sofia is....napping! I'm really super tired. But for some reason I can't get comfortable. Oh well.

Husband is gone this weekend hunting. I haven't heard from him yet, so my guess is he hasn't gotten anything. I hope he does, only because I know it will make him happy. Also, it's nice to have ground venison. Saves lots of money when we don't have to buy ground meat for a while!

Speaking of money....we need to write a budget. I don't understand how we can have two incomes and many times are still struggling to make ends meet. Then I realize we haven't really been accounting for the fact that we now spend nearly $700/month in daycare, plus whatever we spend on diapers and formula and whatever else Sofia needs. She seems to outgrow clothes pretty quickly lately, or she poops in them and they are beyond the point of rescuing. Also, both mine and Husband's student loans are in repayment. All normal stuff. We just need to re-write our budget now to include the extra baby stuff that we never had to account for before. Yes, babies are expensive.

I'm watching it rain. I'm waiting for it to get yucky. We're supposed to have this drizzle rain, and then it's going to freeze and snow on top of it. I'm happy I don't have to go anywhere today. :)

Sofia had a doctor's appointment yesterday. The doctor says she is doing excellent. She's chubby, but that's good. I asked the doctor if it was alright and he said that they much rather would see a chubby baby than a skinny baby!! She's in between the 75th and 90th percentile for everything and the doctor has no concerns at all. She's wonderful. And so cute. Here's a picture of her before she got angry and had to have her shots.


Tomorrow morning we have a play date with my coworker Sarah and her little guy Jake. Jake is a few weeks older than Sofia. We're looking forward to it. Edit. We didn't go. Sarah and Jake came down with the flu. :(

Sofia is trying super hard to roll over. Hasn't happened yet, but it will soon. Super cute. She makes me happy even when other things make me sad.

peanut

Baby is SLEEPING right now!! Which means I have a small window of opportunity to say some stuff.

My days fly by, as do my weeks. I'm exhausted but super happy. I don't know how women work 40 hours a week, take care of a baby, maintain a clean house, and their sanity. I'm not doing it. Husband helps a LOT. He does most of the cleaning. I don't know what I'd do without him! I love him and I'm so happy that I have him to go through this journey with me. He's such a great dad.

I thought I'd try and multitask this afternoon. Husband has been out of town all weekend for military duty and will be home this evening. I have had this butternut squash sitting on the counter for weeks. I thought I'd bake it and freeze it for future use.....for babyfood, or some yummy dinner if I ever have time to cook. Sofia loves her jumparoo, so I brought it into the kitchen and put her in it that way she could bounce around while I baked. She was pretty happy and excited. When she started to be fussy, I figured she had tinkled in her diaper and thought I'd get to it in a couple of minutes. I finished wrapping the squash in foil and washed my hands, and went to pick her up. That's when I saw it. Her white onesie was brown in back. All the way up to her neck. Oh crap. Really, crap.

Apparently she'd pooped her pants and continued to jump up and down. And as expected, the bouncing up and down caused the poop to squish out the back of her diaper and shoot up to her hair.

Another onesie, lost to a poopy fate. Sofia got a bath after I wiped all the poop off of her. None of it got on her jumparoo though, so that's good.

Early Saturday morning, she also vomited all over me. She's had the sniffles for a few days now and I think swallowing it (eww) has given her an upset tummy, which made her puke. On me. Honestly, it's fine. Really disgusting, but I can handle it. I feel bad for her though. I don't like it when she cries. And being covered in poop makes her cry. I don't blame her. I kind of wanted to cry too.

I'm at a loss right now. So I'm going to show you some cute pictures. Enjoy. :)

domesticity

I used to have it. That's why I started this blog to begin with. I gardened, cooked, and baked. And cleaned. A lot.

Then I had a baby. I foolishly thought that I would be able to keep up all that other stuff while raising a baby. It's because I watch TV shows, like Desperate Housewives. But now I realize that Bree Van de Kamp isn't real.

There was this one episode where one house wife/stay at home mom couldn't figure out how another house wife/stay at home mom was able to raise her kids and keep a tidy house and have home cooked meals and baked goods on the table every night all while still getting the shopping and other errands done AND making her kids' costumes for the school play.

Turns out the woman was stealing her kid's ADHD medication.

Well, despite the fact that I have convinced my primary care physician to write me prescriptions for dextroamphetamine, I'm still not able to find the time to do all of the stuff I used to do. My house is a mess, and all-in-one skillet meals have taken the place of homemade lasagna and baked ziti. I did, however, manage to throw a roast together the other day along with potatoes. But to be fair, I used a slow cooker and was half-asleep after dragging my butt out of bed at 5am to hurry up and do it before the baby woke up and before I had to get ready for work. I was in my underwear. And Husband did the potatoes. It really wasn't much work at all since it took 5 minutes to dump everything in the pot and press the button, and then go to work for the day.

I miss being able to do that stuff.

So I made cookies today. To be fair, I've let everything else go. In fact, I'm not even home. I'm at my parents house, house-sitting for the day while they pick my brother up from the airport. Sofia is napping in her swing. I made cookies. From scratch. Not from the tube of cookie dough. I also took a shower, and I didn't rush. Baby is still sleeping. :)

I can't find my camera. So here's a grainy picture from my crappy cell phone.

I need a nap.

back to work.

So... I went back to work today. It wasn't as bad as I thought. Not that my job is bad, but being gone for 12 weeks makes it difficult to just jump right back into something and remember how to do everything.

I'm glad to be back, but it's hard to focus when my mind keeps wandering and thinking about Sofie and wondering how she is doing....wondering if she is okay. But if she wasn't okay, the daycare would call me. So I need to just stop worrying. But I miss her cute face. The best part of my day is when work is over and I get to go and pick her up from daycare. I get really excited to pick her up. I get butterflies in my stomach because I get so excited, and my heart skips a beat when I see her. I wish I could just stay home with her and collect a salary. That would be great. Oh well.

This weekend, Husband has to go out of town for some military stuff, so baby and I are going to have lots of mommy/baby time. Maybe if it's nice out, we'll go for a walk. We'll probably end up staying at my mom and dad's because I feel weird being overnight alone with her. I just like to have someone around in case I need help. I realize that there are parents out there who do it alone, but since I have the option of having some help, I like to have help. And my parents just love it when the baby is over at their house.

Nana gets to have Sofie on Fridays, and I'm really happy about that. If Sofie could talk, she would say she's excited, too. Sofie loves her Nana. :)

that parent

Sofia likes her bath. I like giving her baths. Here are pictures from last night. I can't pick a favorite, so here are all 12.













The other day when I went to the clinic for my 6-week follow-up, I stopped at the coffee shop in the lobby to get a hot cocoa. The lady asked how I was doing. I told her I was fine, but that I had just taken my baby to daycare that day for the first time. She asked how old my baby was. I told her. Then I proceeded to show her pictures in my phone of Sofia. The lady responded with, "Oh, cute."

Today when I was shopping for clothes (since I'm too small for my maternity clothes but still too fat for my regular clothes), the cashier asked what my new baby's name was (she knew I had just had a baby because I was talking to her about why I was there shopping for clothes). I told her, and then almost pulled out my phone to show her a picture. I stopped myself. I realize that I have become "that parent" who wants to show everyone, even strangers, pictures of her kid. People who will politely say, "oh, cute," but really won't care, and will secretly hope you will stop showing them pictures of your baby who they don't know and don't care about.

Oops.

The other day, I went to the grocery store. When I got back in the car, I noticed that I had messy hair and dried spit-up on my shoulder.

I'm "that parent" who looks like a slob and is too tired to care.

When I was putting Sofia's car seat in the back of my SUV the other day, I saw some sort of new minivan drive by. I actually thought to myself, "This would be easier if I had a minivan."

I'm not going to do it.

true colors

It's a fact that you figure out who your true friends are once you have had a baby.

People who attack you and try to make you feel bad because you haven't called or kept in touch are not real friends. If they were, they would know that you are most likely very busy with your newborn. They would give you a break rather than send you harassing messages over Facebook accusing you of being selfish and not putting effort into the friendship. Those people have no lives whatsoever, which is obvious, since they are staying up until all hours of the night losing sleep while sending you these messages. Normal people sleep at that time, unless you are a new mom and happen to be up feeding your baby. I don't have time for those people.

People who seem to find a way to negatively respond to every positive thing you say or do are not your friends. Putting a smiley face after your comment doesn't mean what you are saying is nice. Do you know what it means to be passive aggressive? It's a devious, diabolical way of conveying your anger, disappointment, or hurt to someone without actually speaking to them about it. Your feelings may be acted out by the way you treat them and also by talking to other people about the person. It's unfortunate that I have "friends" like this, and I don't know why I bother to keep them in my life. Lately, I am reminded more and more that I just need to downsize the people in my life and only leave room for the people who are going to add something positive. It's difficult to do that though. It has gotten to the point where I don't know how to go about it anymore. But I can't have toxic people in my life anymore. I can't have people in my life that make me feel bad all the time. It's emotionally draining, and I have a baby to take care of, and she deserves my energy. Not these people who obviously have no regard for my feelings.

People don't mature with age. I'm learning that. Some people will always be spiteful and immature and petty. I need to just be the one to make the decision not to let it affect me any longer. It's easier said than done. I've gotten rid of one person today. I am hoping that helps a little and I am hoping she leaves me alone. I said some mean things. I'm not entirely proud of it, but she deserved it. That's when you know the person is toxic.... when they bring out the worst in you.

And stop comparing my daughter to your stupid dog. My baby's name is Sofia. I call her Sofie for short. I don't give two shits if your dog is "your baby" and your dog's name is Sophie. Stop comparing your stupid dog to my child whenever I post pictures or talk about something new that my baby is doing. And stop joking about how I must have named my baby after your dog. You are stupid and every time you open your mouth I want to hurt you a little more.